This is a post I've been dreading to write. Not only is it the last month and half of our lives its an emotional one for me!! But here it goes.
Right before the kids and I flew to Arkansas to visit my family Josh and I found out we were pregnant (don't get too excited just yet). We had planned it and were so excited to welcome our 3rd (and probably final) baby and what perfect timing!! I knew it was early to start telling people but it's so much more fun to tell people in person than online or on the phone so I told our family. Josh wasn't due to come to Arkansas until a week after I got there so we waited to tell the kids until Josh got there...and it was hilarious. Garrett thought we were lying and Haylee thought there was milk in my tummy but they were both so excited...esp Haylee!!
We had a really good time in Arkansas. We saw and played with cousins in the sun and at the pool. We jumped into the river and Grandma and Grandpa's house and I had the privilege of photographing my cousin's wedding (which was scary and exciting all at the same time). It was a really great time!!!
In Tulsa with Aunt Lindsey!! What are you doing Garrett??
There next few are at the river down the road from my parent's house!!
There was a rope to swing from....we had to talk Garrett into doing it EVERYTIME and we couldn't keep Haylee away from it!! LOL!!!
My Family....minus STEVE!!
Practicing shooting arrows with Grandpa!!
At the river again!!
Cousin Karterr!! Garrett LOVED him so much and he was AWESOME with Garrett!!
Stick them up!!
My dad and Josh TRYING to do flips....
Cousin Dax...he is only 3 months older than Garrett!!
Playing at the farm (where my Grandparent's live)!!
Cousin Kendall!!
Who knew milking cows could be so loud!!
Cousins, cousins, and more cousins!!!
Here are some of the pictures of my cousin's wedding!!
My family at the wedding....we actually have everyone in the same place at one time....minus Steve!! :(
We then rented a car and drove down to NM to visit Clovis. It was really great seeing all of our friends from Clovis and I had another great opportunity to shoot a senior photography session!!! I LOVE THIS!!! Josh's dad was able to come to Clovis and visit for a few days. The kids enjoyed getting to know him and little better and we hope to see him a little more often.
While we were in Clovis I started bleeding and it was known after a few hours that I was miscarrying. It was heartbreaking for me telling the kids and just knowing this wasn't going to happen right now. We knew that God had a plan for us and I was excited I was leaving for our Mission Mexico trip in just a few days and I knew that it would be a great inspiration for me!!
Senior Pictures!!
We were waiting for the fireworks to start!!
Josh's family...minus Jessie!
HAPPY 4th of July!!
Josh's dad came
After a week in Clovis we drove up to the Cimarron Canyon where Josh spent his summer's growing up and Josh's parent's camp all summer long. We camped for a couple of days before we had to fly out. The kids were going to stay there for the next week in a half while I went to Mexico and Josh went back to school.
PS: I will get pictures of Mexico posted soon...but here is the story!!
The mission trip all started when Josh and I left our kids in NM with Nana and Papa.....FREEDOM!!! We had a whole day to ourselves!! I don't remember what that was like. We SLEPT IN until 8am. Went grocery shopping WITHOUT hearing can we get this, I want that, ooh look at that, can I have that. We dropped the groceries off and then went berry picking!! It was great!!
I did get this gut feeling that I needed to be seen before flying off to Mexico for a week so I was seen in a local clinic where they did an ultrasound (that showed nothing) and did a blood HCG (pregnancy hormone test). They assured me it was ok and when I returned to come back and get another blood test to make sure it was coming down to 0. The day before I left it was 806.
Then the next day I had to be at the airport at 3:30....yes that's right, AM!! The 15 women (and 3 men...our team leader's husband and 2 boys) were ready to embark on the 1st all Women's (mostly) Southwest Church of Christ Mission's Trip. We stopped in Denver (which might I add, I was just there 2 days prior) and then landed in Mexico City!! Mexico City is a city that goes on and on and on (area wide population of close to 22 million)!! It was insane looking out when we were landing!!
The first thing I noticed was the housing!!! Houses looked so different in Mexico than they did in the US. They were not only colorful and close together....some of them weren't complete. They had clothes drying on the roofs/balonies. Some windows were just holes in the wall with no glass or covering. They looked as though they may fall apart. I had never seen anything like it before.
We had people from the church come pick us up and the 45 min drive looked like other cities (minus the bumpy roads and houses). The one difference I remember was seeing horses and donkey's tied up by shops.
We went straight to the church which looked like a normal church. It was a pretty building with a multipurpose room, a large auditorium, and several offices and class rooms. They had sandwiches ready for us and everyone was so nice. I thought I'd be a little weirded out by the hugging and kissing but I wasn't at all!!
When dinner was all finished we met our host families and Kristin and hi met this AMAZING family....(who lived across the street from the church)...Carlos and Juanita with their three kids, Carli (14), David (10), and Josue (7). They also have a 23 year old women staying with them (Jessica). The house was definatly different than our house in Oregon. It was 6 stories with 1 room on each floor. You first walked into a courtyard and then when you came in the front door you walked in a small living room (probably 8x8ft). You could walk downstairs to the dining room and kitchen (which consisted of a fridge, sink, and oven) and if you walked upstairs there was a bedroom and bathroom. The next floor was another bedroom and then the next floor took you outside and then there was a door with another bedroom. The next two floors were for drying and washing clothes.
We got to our families house around 7pm and they asked us if we wanted to go for tacos at 9pm. In the mean time we got to know our family a little more. They did not speak English but Kristin did speak quite a bit of Spanish. They had several family members and friends come say hi to us!! They were all so nice and wonderful. One of my favorite person was Emilio....he was SO funny!! They saying of the week was "Oh my Gato!!...which means "oh my cat"!! It was so funny when he said it!!
We were both so tired but wanted to embark on the taco adventure. We left around 9pm and drove to this literal whole in the wall taco shop. They cooked the tacos outside and there was a little room to sit. These were the BEST taco's I've ever add!!! A few feet from the "Taco Shop" was a cart with dessert and had this amazing flan!!! After taco's they took us for a night tour of the city!!!
Sunday morning we woke up and went to church. Church was a lot like church in the states...except all in Spanish. We had church at 10am and then at 11:30am we had class. I did not understand much of what was being said but it was still interesting. After church several of the men and some women went outside to play volleyball while several or the women prepared a potluck for us.
The next we held a devotional for everyone and then broke up into 4 different groups for mini classes to do all day. There was a chocolate making class, kids/nutrition play class, crocheting rug making class, and a fleece no sew blanket making class. They were all a hit!! It was a blast!!!
The next day the women taught us how to make a few traditional Mexican dishes that were amazing!!!
That afternoon we decided to serve the women by washing their feet!! WOW!! I had no idea what to expect!! I washed this woman's feet that did not want to participate because she felt her feet were too ugly and disfigured from years of arthritis. As I was washing her feet she was crying and I was afraid it was because of me. She later told me "that as I washed her feet she felt as my hands were Jesus' and she had an injection of healing go through her body." I believe she touched me more than I touched her!!!
The next two days we traveled to two different pueblo's where we did the mini classes again. Going into Toluca amazed me but these little pueblo's were mind blowing. Their houses were nothing. Some of the houses didn't even have roofs!! These people had NOTHING!!! They were so kind and so giving though!!!
After one of the pueblo's we went up to these pyramids were we did a little devotional!! It was so amazing singing to God where you felt you were on top of the world!! God is AMAZING!!!
That trip is exactly what I needed to put into perceptive my life and what God has planned for me!! I was so pumped and so excited to return...and Satan could not stand that!!!
When we returned from Mexico, the following Monday I returned to the clinic for a blood draw where I knew it was going to be 200....to my surprise it was 1900. I was ordered to have an ultrasound right away where they saw a 5 week gestational sac. WHAT?!?! I had come to terms with this miscarriage!! Maybe God is blessing me with a baby?!? I didn't know what to feel. I returned in 48 hrs for a repeat blood test (they are suppose to double in 48 hrs) and mine was 2100....it didn't double but it was going up!! The dr. said to return in a week for a repeat ultrasound and blood test...but that night I had this HORRIBLE pain in my abdomen!!
Long story short Josh took me to the ER where they admitted me. My HCG levels rose again to 2500 and the ultrasound looked the same. We chose to wait it out...see if my levels continued to rise and what the ultrasound do. I was still having horrible pain and nausea. My levels continued to rise but never doubled as they should and after 4 days the "gestational sac" shrunk a little. I was then given the news I already knew....this is not a viable pregnancy. I was praying so hard it was but now I knew for sure. I was taken to surgery shortly after that to end this pregnancy once and for all.
After seven days in the hospital, both of our mom's flying out, and emotions going every which way we are now back home and healing. That took everything out of me, both physically, mentally and spiritually. Satan took that high I had leaving Mexico right out me but he will NOT WIN!! He may have knocked me down but I am a fighter and I have JESUS CHRIST on my side and will get right back up. I am getting stronger everyday and I have felt the prayers of so many of our friends and family!! Thank you very much!!
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